Everything Else

My Not So Crafty Side #4

     Hey everyone!

     So, this post is a week late. I had plans to write it last week but I got busy…playing computer games…so instead of a monthly catch up post you’re getting a not so crafty side one! You might be wondering why I can’t just do the monthly catch up post on Friday – the answer to that not phrased as a question question is that tomorrow is December so that means it’s the start of my post every day of the month challenge featuring plenty of Christmas crafts and topics. My blog schedule for December is already packed full so there’s no room for a catch up post.

     But this is a ‘not so crafty side post’ so no more talking about crafts. This post is for all that other life stuff that I get up to and write about every few months (because not enough happens in my life to blog regularly about it).

     So, remember how in the last ‘Not So Crafty Side‘ post (about two months ago) I talked about how excited I was to be starting my online master’s degree in World Heritage Conservation? I guess it’s time to give an update on that…

     I dropped out.

     Well, I think I’m still dropping out. I filled in the form and sent that in about three weeks ago and I’m not sure how long they take to process that but I’ve stopped doing the course work and haven’t submitted assignments so in my mind, I’ve dropped out.

      Remember how I’d mentioned last week in my planner post about how I’d been having a bad time lately? Well, When I started the master’s course, my anxiety and stress started getting worse. I kinda ignored it at first, putting it down to just getting used to a new topic and how online learning worked. Unfortunately, the anxiety didn’t go away, even after the first month. I was enjoying learning about the topic, but every time I had to do a study journal and answer some questions, I’d start to feel really overwhelmed and panicky. I got through the first assignment which was an essay but by the time the second assignment came round, I was feeling a lot worse. At one point, I just started crying whenever I looked at the project question and I had no idea why. After several hours of failing to do research for the assignment (because it’s really hard to read documents when your tears are making the screen blurry), I came to the realisation that maybe this online degree wasn’t going to work for me. Ii helped that I’d been talking to a friend of mine who also recently dropped out of his master’s degree.

     About when I started the course, I also started noticing I was getting bad headaches at least once, maybe twice a week. I didn’t know why I was getting them and I spent a good while trying to figure out what might be causing them, putting it down to things like posture and time staring at a screen, but I haven’t had a headache now in about three weeks which lines up with when I dropped out so it’s seeming quite clear now what the cause was without my realising it.

     So, that’s my news and what I’ve been getting up to in my life. While I really liked what I was learning, the how didn’t suit me. I’m not sure if maybe just studying at master’s level doesn’t suit me or if it’s specifically the online aspect that doesn’t. I know with the online aspect, I did miss the contact with other students and being able to casually discuss things, be it specifically about a topic or about dealing with the course in general. There were (sometimes) forums that went with the weeks content but those aren’t the same as chatting over a cup of tea and some chips. Also, the course content was just in the form of a PDF document you had to read with links to other online things to read – at some point I was just wanted a human voice to be telling me things rather than having to read everything!

     I’ve been feeling a lot better since dropping out though (ignoring the still unemployed thing for now), so yay! Instead of studying, I’ve just been watching a lot of Naruto Shippuden. Also a lot of Drawfee videos (really funny YouTube channel, definitely check it out) – watching those definitely helped me when I needed a funny thing to watch to stop crying. I’ve also been watching a lot of Draw with Jazza on YouTube which has been making me want to get back into drawing more as I haven’t done much more than doodles in so long! But that’s getting back into talking about crafty topics I think.

     Veering back into arts and crafts topics, I guess that’s I good spot to end this blog post. I’ll hope that the next ‘not so crafty side’ post  at the end of January has some more positive news to tell you!

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13 thoughts on “My Not So Crafty Side #4

  1. Finally emerging from my own anxiety/application fog to catch up on your blog! I admire you for making the right decision for you, and I’m so glad that your physical symptoms (ah, my old friends the stress headaches) are starting to subside. And you’ve come away with the knowledge that you are nonetheless interested in this subject, even if this program wasn’t the best way of studying it, which is good! You can still Conserve The Heritage one day, if you’d like 🙂 ❤

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    1. How’s that going for you? I found applying for master’s degrees bad enough, I can only imagine how stressful it is for you!
      Stress headaches are awful, especially when you’re trying to deny your stressed so end up furiously looking for other causes to no avail.
      Yes, the good thing is I still like the subject, I just need to find another way of going about focusing in it!

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  2. I’m sorry to hear that your Master’s courses gave you such awful anxiety! Online learning isn’t for everyone. I can understand how you would miss the actual face-to-face contact with other people. I’m glad that you’ve been feeling better since dropping out. Once you’re feeling better and you’ve had some time to think about it, you always have the option of continuing your Master’s course in an in-person setting, if you decide you would like to continue.

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    1. Thanks for the support! Having had some time to think about, I definitely made the right decision – I’ve been feeling a lot better since dropping out. And I’ve come out of it still liking the subject so that’s something. Once the holiday season is over, I’m definitely going to start focusing more on either looking for work or study opportunities in the heritage field, so I don’t think it was a complete waste of time studying online!

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  3. Online study is not for everyone, and more than that–from personal experience I’ve found that even when I can be successful at some online coursework, there are some things which just really work better for me “in the real world.” Just don’t be hard on yourself. A better time may very well come.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Yes, I found that some parts of the online learning I was fine with – reading detailed PDFs in your own time is better in a way than sitting in a lecture hall at whatever time is assigned to you, but tutorial based classes with face to face contact turns out are really useful for me!

      Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks ^-^ Ya, guess the whole online learning at a high level just isn’t for me. I think it’s fine for lighter stuff, like the short free courses you can find, but for degree level, for me at least!

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